How To Tell Your Roommate It’s Over

By Kylie Exline on March 14, 2016

We all know the internal struggle of living with someone you regret living with. It can happen after a few weeks, months, or maybe even after that initial night when they ate your leftover Chinese. Not cool.

If already realizing that you definitely do not want to live with the same college roommate(s) next year, read these tips below to know how to relay the message to said roommate.

It’s Not Me, It’s You:

This approach is not always received well, if you know what I mean. Throwing insults at your lovely roommate is not always the best idea. You tell them they are a slob everywhere, make too much noise when you made it perfectly clear that you have an exam in the morning (worth 30 percent may I add), and should accept the reward for No. 1 complainer. As you can imagine, they would most likely not take that too lightly.

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If sticking with this path, you may want to prepare safety precautions beforehand. You know, in case they resort to throwing whatever is closest to them, or start yelling at the top of their lungs. This is not for certain, but definitely a possibility, especially if he or she is a tad crazy.

It’s Not You, It’s Me:

This is more popular as you can imagine, and can really help you in getting out of a less than desirable situation really fast. Who cares if you may be lying with 99 percent of the things you are saying? They will not have a clue. *Fingers crossed. *

Make them believe that it is your fault you just cannot live with them again, and that it just would not be fair for them to have to deal with it. Really sell it. And be prepared for them to claim they will change and really want to work it out. Do not be weak. Stick to your gut and fabrication. I believe in you.

Honesty is the Best Policy:

This is my go-to if anything. If they ever do something that you do not agree with, just let them know. This way, they can never say that you bottled in everything and then randomly took it out on them. I mean, they could say this, but then they would be incredibly wrong.

If being honest, then it should not be that big of a surprise to them when you say you are moving on. Express to them how the living arrangement is not working out for you at all, and you need to make some major changes in your life. If they are genuinely your friend, they should at least try to understand where you are coming from.

Rip the Band-Aid off and say RIP to that roommate ship. Friendship is still an option, unless that went completely down the drain after you told them they were the absolute worst roommate ever. But hey, if not, then you guys can still be friends — seriously.

List the Pros:

This can work if you are smart about it. You have to express to them how not living with you any further will really benefit them. I am talking about saying they deserve better, someone that can and will go out with them every single weekend in a semester, and will satisfy their weird kitchen tendencies. Because honestly, is it that big of a deal to turn the lights off when you leave a room? Didn’t think so.

Giving them all of the pros should help them recognize that it is not meant to be: to be a roommate that is. You are better off as friends (if things end well) and could really use some time and space apart, living wise.

Make it sound really convincing, and maybe even start doing things that definitely annoy them to help them feel the same way. Like leave your dishes out for an extended amount of time, or keep the living room television on full blast when you know they are napping. (P.S. This may potentially turn ugly real fast.)

Having roommates is no easy feat, ask anyone and they will definitely let you know. However, you should not make the mistake of rooming with them again simply because you feel bad, or think it may actually work out the second time around.

Prolonging the inevitable is never a good idea, nor is staying in complete denial about a situation. We all know how it is not really fun to have to end a friendship, relationship, or roommateship with someone, but it must be done.

They may take it harsh because it is a breakup, but it is better to attempt to save the friendship now, rather than later. Who knows, maybe you will end up living together again someday?

Just kidding.

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